It’s like admitting failure (albeit temporary failure).
My long-lost dream of running a marathon has been smashed to smithereens by endless papers and practicums and snow. Yes, you heard correctly. Snow in October. Sick. I would curse grad school if this wasn’t the place where God wanted me right now.
Hello, Winter!
So yes, I waved my white flag of defeat. And traded in my 20 mile runs outside for Zumba and HIIT classes.
I will run you marathon. Maybe not this year, but soon. Very soon.
The decision to run a marathon was the result of a default. The default ultimately came from the question: Why not? There isn’t a reason NOT to run one so I might as well.
What I like about training: I don’t have to think about what I will do each day to workout- this is something to truly rejoice in.
What I absolutely abhor about training: there is no flexibility in the schedule.
And since my training regimen begun at about the same time that my life transitioned dramatically (again) the concluding result meant one day I was running on a treadmill in central Phoenix at an apartment complex I don’t actually live in and the next day I was running in a cemetery in central Michigan:
Praying while running: Multitasking at its best.
I’m hoping this means my body will get used to multiple conditions in a short amount of time making the race a breeze. Will check back once my long run reaches 20. I’m already thinking of the black velvet I will thoroughly be enjoying after that run….
Now to get to the real meat of this post:
Mama Mary by Fra Angelico
I know many people that have consecrated themselves to Mary both through St. Louis de Montfort’s method as well as St. Maximilion Kolbe’s method. Typically I would not go to such lengths, not because I don’t love Mary and believe in giving all to Christ through her, but because so many people were doing it and I fight against anything “mainstream” (talk about a lethal dose of pride).
Since I absolutely insisted on not doing the consecration, Mary had to break me down. And that happened three years ago when I quite literally fell off a second story loft breaking my ankle three days before I was supposed to move 5 states away.
Just a mini FYI: Becoming handicapped forces you to slow down. And it showed me just how little I am in control of my life. That was the first time I consecrated myself to her loving care on the Feast of the Assumption.
Fast forward three years later, a couple of convent stays, moving 8 times, and much sin and I once again felt a deep need to renew my consecration to her.
And God, in his loving Providence, allowed me to do this at Notre Dame:
Notre Dame beauty
Consecrating myself to Mary is kind of like marathon training. The preparation is as intense as the actual day. And maintaining afterwards takes just as much work. Day in-Day out. Totus Tuus.
On the evening drive leaving Notre Dame, sitting next to my best friend in the driver’s seat, passing through the small town of Constantine, Michigan on the Feast of the Assumption, as the dusk was settling in and this song was playing on the radio:
I let the tears stream down my face. Because being chained to her is the most liberating experience I have ever had.
This month has been jam -packed with discernment so all side projects (including but not limited to this blog) have moved their way to the bottom of the priority list.
I managed to steal a few moments of time today to be crafty and enjoy some otium sanctum (that’s holy leisure in Latin for all you non-ecclesiastical-speaking-peoples) on this most blessed Sunday.
I have been on the prowl of late for some nun skirts that also feature handy-dandy pockets. Apparently, this little piece of clothing is not in fashion these days because I can’t seem to find them anywhere.
So, I made one instead:
And then I went running. IN ThE RAIN. A rarity that happens once every 5 billion years in the desert.
And then I sat and listened to this:
Which pretty much sums up my life right now.
If you are reading this sentence, can you say a little prayer for me? Decision time is coming up shortly! Gracias 🙂
I love lists. and Maps. and Papers. But I am not a task-oriented nazi. I usually write to-do lists for the sake of writing them and then promptly lose them or forget about them.
Exhibit A:
My wedding anniversary that never happened was May 3, 2008. Five years later and there is still a never-before-worn wedding dress and chapel veil hanging in my closet. That little doozy has been on my to-do list for the past 2 years but it hasn’t helped me get any closer to selling the darn thing.
Many people have tried to therapize me and tell me all of my subconcious feelings towards the dress and that relationship, but really it just comes down to one thing:
I’m lazy.
So in an attempt to organize my life, I’ve identified 3 motivational kick-starters:
1. Surround yourself with motivated individuals. When my friend ran an ultra-marathon (For those of you normal people out there- that is fifty miles. Five, Zero.) on her thirtieth birthday, my motivation sky-rocketed and I began training harder, racing half-marathons, and have since started training for my first full. I don’t think I will ever love running THAT much to run an ultra, but her example has been a great motivator in my own running journey.
2. Get regular and GOOD sleep. This is probably the number one motivational-killer. If you don’t sleep, you don’t function to your full capacity (unless your JPII and God gives you the grace to need only 3 hours of sleep a night).
3. Drink water like a fish. I’m an avid believer that water= brain juice. And while I am clearly addicted to coffee, I know my caffeine overload is more likely to induce a heart attack than productive outcomes. When water is my main drink of choice, I feel more energized, am more clear-headed and more desirous to get things accomplished.
I am an absolute prude when it comes to television and movies. Anything past the rating level of “PG” and you can bet I’m walking out of the room. A visual learner who doesn’t want images stuck in their brain- that’s me.
The worst (and only) thing I watch regularly is re-runs of Friends.
Probably the main reason I’m not in a convent yet. Classic.
As much as I disdain and abhor rotten television and movies, I must admit a dirty secret:
I listen to the WORSTmusic. It’s out of control.
Here are my current top 5 running songs:
1) “Stronger” by Kanye West
2) “Poker Face” by Lady Gaga
3) “Give Me Everything” by Pitbull
4) “One More Night” by Maroon 5
5) “Scream & Shout” by Will.i.am & Britney Spears
Shame. Shame. Shame.
What am I doing listening to lyrics that degrade the human person while simultaneously promoting sexual promiscuity and anger?
When people inevitably find out my dirty little secret either by a) hearing the extremely loud music coming out of my headphones while I’m running or by b) having my phone go off in the midst of meetings, Adoration, etc. (because I am technologically inept) I make excuses:
“Oh, my brother and I share i-Tunes. That’s actually his music.”
“Oh, ya know, I can’t really run without music and the beat keeps me going fast.” (which is technically true)
So friends, I am on a quest for fast-paced, up-beat, sans lyrical music. Music that won’t also send me on a fast-paced track to Purgatory (I have other vices that can do that) because I’m not all that confident that the Lord will listen to my claim that I get my best ideas while listening to Like a G6.
Mapmyrun is by far my favorite app. Maps in general are a pretty good time-waster for me but mapping out my runs is truly how I inspire motivation. If I can visualize where I’m going in my brain before I do it, I’m way more likely to complete the workout.
So when I looked at my calendar last weekend and realized that my next half is TWO WEEKS away, I sent right out to planning my training schedule (a little late in the game but that’s typically how I roll when it comes to races).
My ankles took a severe beating by the fact that this run was half trails. Mapmyrun will be receiving a little comment from me in their suggestion box.
(Warning: Death by jagged rocks: 4.6 miles)
(When I felt like quitting around 8.4 I ran the rest of it for Papa B for his last week as Pope. 8 years as Pope for him…8 years as a Catholic for me….He will always be my Papa.)
(including Jagged rock trails)
The light at the end of the tunnel:
(Why Hello deliciousness in a cup)
(Being spoiled with an outing to True Food….LOOK at those veggies!)
(a birthday party with the cutest 3 year olds ever created)
I was all set today to write this awe-inspiring (barely) and thought-provoking (maybe) post about the awesome-ness of God. Three tissue boxes later and a splitting migraine that is making it impossible for me to see less than double and you are left with a random photo collage of the magic of everyday life:
1. Welcome Home! I recently moved into quite possibly the cutest house ever made in maybe the best location ever with two of my most favorite people. Ever. Love it.
Just call it Snow White’s Cottage 🙂
2. Go Cards! I’m not really that into football but I went to a game recently for a certain nameless special someone. It’s all about sacrifice. 😉
At the stadium with Roommate/Friend/Shopping girl extraordinaire ClaireBear
3. Running. This is a scene from a recent run of mine. I’ve been doing some heat training (running in the middle of the day when it’s 100+) as well as increasing my mileage to prepare for a couple of upcoming halfs. I snapped this pic on a long run while passing by a group of older men racing sailboats. This is the stuff of life that gives me hope for the world.
4. When your best friend becomes a Deacon, Life is pretty awesome. I am going to Roma in two short weeks to witness the transitional diaconate ordination of my dearly beloved friend, Michael, on the Feast of St. Francis. It has been a long journey and I am so proud of him! Please pray for him as he prepares to respond to this next step in his journey with the Lord.
Grand Canyon Sunrise! (Back when wrinkles didn’t exist)
Enjoy the weekend! I’m back to air-bourne, ricola, and bed. 🙂
Tooooo cute! These little guys were my entertainment on my long run this morning. Their parents weren’t too thrilled with the paparazzi (AKA: me) taking pictures, but I couldn’t resist!
Collapsing under the realization that running after 6am is no longer a possibility. Thank you Arizona summer.
My wittle ball of fluff being so super cute. <3<3<3
Hanging out with one of the coolest little people ever. She is only 2 and has managed to master the iPad 😉
Today begins the official 6 week countdown until I begin candidacy with the Poor Clare’s of Perpetual Adoration. In the midst of tying up loose ends at my job, moving back to the parentals, and trying to get all the details ready for July 1st, I am really just trying to stay close to Him and praying for the gifts of the Holy Spirit during this novena in preparation for Pentecost.
I really don’t consider myself a competitive person, but I tend to go through short bursts of wanting to challenge myself in some fashion or another. The theme lately has been running.
Last week, I impulsively decided to sign up for a half-marathon that is on the 19th. Newsflash: that is a mere two weeks away! I am a fairly avid runner but tend to be more of a sprinter/short-distance runner so this is pretty much a leap outside my comfort zone. My life of late has consisted of many hours of training followed by many glasses of chocolate milk (the best recovery food ever!). My poor blog, laundry, car, general appearance, etc. has seen some serious neglect as I’ve been channeling most of my energy into running, work, and sleeping! I am so excited to compete (ah-hem: survive) in the half-marathon and it will make me super prepared to run The Nun Run 10k in March. If you are in Phoenix you should definitely consider signing up for the run! All the proceeds go to support the Poor Clare’s of Perpetual Adoration at Our Lady of Solitude Monastery.